Considering update to Backyard subforum guidelines

[ionbeam]

...My older brother can no longer see any other view but his own. And if you don't agree with him he will hammer on you until you agree or will walk away disgusted. Because of that I no longer call him or see him very often. Now that's between brothers. What chance do two pig-headed strangers have?

Unfortunately, that's my youngest brother. I finally had to tell him I don't want to hear from him again.

The only way I can keep up with events going on in my tiny town is to follow the town Facebook page and the Rockingham Alert page. I don't know if Facebook works as a filter to attract damaged people or if the people in my town are simply self centered, angry assholes. Instead of adult level conversations they hit everything with a super sized hammer, no middle ground, no attempt to understand, everything gets blasted with a hammer. So far as this: it would look like a beautiful solution compared to what they do.

[Intech]

FYB
FYB
FYB
FYB
F*U*C*K

Just trying to help Wayne!

[DesignFlaw06]

You want to rant? There’s the Backyard. Have at it, but don’t complain about what goes on in there. Don’t want to see or hear that stuff? Stay out.

That sounds good on paper, but in practice, that isn't what is happening. Don't engage in personal attacks seems like a pretty simple rule as well but is not always followed either. While it is claimed that the Backyard isn't moderated, that stuff still falls back to us. We still get reported posts. We still get PMs. We intervene and are thanked for it by angry posts, emails, texts, etc.

[danh600]

Since I am not a member of the backyard I guess I shouldn't poke my nose in here. But I am.

First off I am not a member of the backyard. Never been in there. Have no idea who is having a fight right now. No idea who get's offended. No idea who is considered a bully. Doesn't effect me unless it effects the forum.

1. Does it add value to the forum? Are there a good number of members that enjoy it? If the answer is no then nuke it. It really shouldn't be taking up Wayne and Tim's time. There are plenty of places on the internet to talk politics and have internet bitch slapping fights.

2. If we keep it. Make it a true gloves off almost un-moderated place. Basically you have to sign up to get in. Regular members don't see it. So you go in at your own peril. If you get offended in there just leave. Don't report post to Wayne or Tim. If people want to get in internet bitch slap fights let them. Let them not agree to disagree. Let them carry on for days and blow off steam. Let them call each other idiots and fucktards.
Just have a few rules. And manly those are to protect the rest of the forum.
1. No reporting post to Wayne or Tim
2. No posting anything that jeopardizes the forum. (Like porn)
3. No threats of violence. You can't actually threaten bodily harm. You can call each other names.
4. No bringing family into it.
5. No internet slap fights spilling over into the regular forum. What happens in the backyard stays in the backyard.
6. Have a moderator that is not Tim or Wayne (that could be unknown) delete the post that go over the line. He is like a baseball umpire. You
argue balls and strikes you are ejected. It is going to be pretty easy to tell if you violated a rule.

Personally I have absolutely no idea how to keep an internet forum going. If the guys that put all their time and effort into this get feed up,then well it might just be gone. I know I am not suppose to say anything bad about the other FJR places, but I just never felt at home there.

I like this place.

[wheatonFJR]

Is calling someone a fucktard a personal attack if you call EVERYONE a fucktard? Doesn't sound personal to me.

Okay, never mind...nothing to see here.

And by the way Dan, I think yer alright...I don't care what FYB says about you.

[extrememarine]

Here in lies the problem. Call someone a f@$ktard in person and you get punched in the face - or at least the last person who called me something similar to that in person did, but that was years ago. Call someone a f@$Ktard on the internet, from the safety provided by your keyboard and computer or smartphone and its supposed to be taken as sarcasm. Call me a f@$ktard in my garage, I can interrupt the tone, volume and infliction for a level of sarcasm that dictates whether you get punched in the face or hugged.

How about choosing your words typed here from the same book that you would if you were standing in that person's garage?

This is beyond just the backyard sub forum. It's the general tone at which communication is happening here. Everyone says, keep it in the backyard, but it's bleeding out elsewhere which was the original prompter for my posts and PM's 2 days ago.

Is calling someone a fucktard a personal attack if you call EVERYONE a fucktard? Doesn't sound personal to me.

Okay, never mind...nothing to see here.

And by the way Dan, I think yer alright...I don't care what FYB says about you.

[wheatonFJR]

Noted. Do not call Wayne a fucktard.

Or anyone else on this forum...except in person.

[D-Eagle]

F you Wayne.
(Said in such a tone that I am giddy waiting for my hug)

[danh600]

And by the way Dan, I think yer alright...I don't care what FYB says about you.

Haha. I think I might be the only person Bob knows from this board that has never actually said FYB to him.

[danh600]

Here in lies the problem. Call someone a f@$ktard in person and you get punched in the face - or at least the last person who called me something similar to that in person did, but that was years ago. Call someone a f@$Ktard on the internet, from the safety provided by your keyboard and computer or smartphone and its supposed to be taken as sarcasm. Call me a f@$ktard in my garage, I can interrupt the tone, volume and infliction for a level of sarcasm that dictates whether you get punched in the face or hugged.

I have to agree. I tend to not separate things said on the internet from things said in person. If I got in a pissing match on here it would carry over to real life. I am not a bad ass and probably wouldn't punch anyone in the face, but I would make no effort to befriend them at an event. Probably why I wouldn't fit in the backyard.

Wayne my post above was a bit tongue in cheek, but the main idea was admins shouldn't have to spend time on this stuff.

[Bounce]

FYB
FYB
FYB
FYB
F*U*C*K

Just trying to help Wayne!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VsMcdEswK8k

You want to rant? There’s the Backyard. Have at it, but don’t complain about what goes on in there. Don’t want to see or hear that stuff? Stay out.

That sounds good on paper, but in practice, that isn't what is happening. Don't engage in personal attacks seems like a pretty simple rule as well but is not always followed either. While it is claimed that the Backyard isn't moderated, that stuff still falls back to us. We still get reported posts. We still get PMs. We intervene and are thanked for it by angry posts, emails, texts, etc.

How about a little add to the Backyard rules? If you complain or report a message in the Backyard that isn't spam or flame wars, YOU get the time out.

I have to agree. I tend to not separate things said on the internet from things said in person. If I got in a pissing match on here it would carry over to real life. I am not a bad ass and probably wouldn't punch anyone in the face, but I would make no effort to befriend them at an event. Probably why I wouldn't fit in the backyard.

Wayne my post above was a bit tongue in cheek, but the main idea was admins shouldn't have to spend time on this stuff.

I think this must be a thing for late-comers to the Internet. I've been around before discussion forums (IRC ASCII text anyone?). It's always been understood that, as with movies and TV, the Internet is pretend and nothing on it matters.

[CollingsBob]

I think that anything that will make extrememarine and designflaw’s job easier should be implemented.

Their forum, their rules.

[NTXFJR]

I think that’s a great idea Bounce, if anyone complains on a post from the backyard, especially after the application warnings given to get into that area, they get the time out. Problem solved.

[extrememarine]

Quick update.

COVID has occupied and consumed nearly every aspect of our lives in some form or another over the past year plus. It's become one of those topics that is so polarizing and controversial in nature that it's nearly impossible to escape. Tones and attitudes stirred within the covid thread inevitably spilled over into conversations outside of that thread, degrading the normal sense of comradery and friendship that this site has cultivated.

If members here want to discuss these hot button topics, there are numerous places to do that already in existence. The keyboard has a unique way of feeding ones brashness to the point of intolerance. I am I saying we should all hold hands and sing hymnals? Nope. This site can exist in a healthy state without the "f@$k you's' over covid or the pandemic or other such topics.

The covid thread will stay locked and removed from view. Any attempts to re-ignite that conversation will be deleted. If political related topics emerge and posts degrade into attacking each other over stated views and opinions, those too will be shut down.

Thank you for your support.

Wayne

[Uncle Hud]

Thank you for your your decision and wisdom.

[HotRodZilla]

Huh. Weird how I missed this for over a week!

What follows is 100% my opinion. If you think it will hurt your feelings, don't read it. Simple.

If someone does not want anything hurtful hurled their way, they should not start divisive conversations or make divisive posts. Simple. IF a person starts down that road and they get reminded that they are an idiot, well, they had an opinion and so did someone else. Again, simple. Nothing to cry about or report. Move on. Simple.

I am 100% sure I'm am one of the offending meanies. A forum friend and I were talking about this stuff the other day. I have also said it numerous times: If I talk smack about Canada or England, or Australia or any other country and a member lives in one of those countries, its about the same as talking smack about their brother. That is absolutely not a conversation to start over the internet.

A while back, a citizen of a county outside of the US would not stop bashing us, after repeated requests to stop. Funny how his posts were never censored but the rest of us heard about it. I 100% admit, I finally went off. I had had enough. Thread got deleted or locked or whatever. I fully expected a time out and didn't get one. I appreciate that.

The recent Covid thread was delving into the same shenanigans. One member seems to LOVE expressing how he is imposing a negative financial impact on those who do not agree with him. Maybe he forgets that some members here have been negatively impacted financially and that shit just isn't funny or cute. No idea, but again, that trash talking was ok, but when I reminded him that I believe he's a clown, suddenly complaints were filed and the thread was again shut down. Heck, pretty sure I didn't even say any real cuss words in that final post. Does my opinion matter that much? I'm flattered!! Why anyone cares what I think is beyond me.

For anyone who is curious, there is NOTHING I will say over the internet that I won't say while standing in front of you. I'm a big boy and I won't cry about my consequences.

We each have our own rules and two of mine are, 1-Don't talk trash about our president. Neither the current one I don't like, nor the previous one I did like are fair game. 2-Don't talk trash about my country. We have our problems, just like you have yours. If you don't like it here, don't come here. There are plenty of countries I don't visit. Hell, I have turned down two very lucrative contracting jobs in two different countries. Just couldn't bring myself to want to live in those places for a year. Never forget this, I love my country enough to give my life for it, and I may not like you at all. I expect you to have the same feelings about your own country and me.

Basically, I'm a, "Remove the plank from your own eye before you worry about the splinter in your neighbor's eye." Once ALL your problems are handled, then, maybe, you may tell us how to handle ours.

The reality is, I was on the verge of stopping coming here. Totally about the time that stuff was popping off. I have to deal with people's BS at work. I don't expect that to happen at the places I go to have fun. I have found that making a couple members, "Foes" in my profile has been a good thing. I don't see their posts, and I'm happier for it. I really like some threads and kind of avoid others. I have not tattle-told on anyone since the 3rd grade, so I won't report your post. I am an opinionated asshole, so I may respond or maybe I'll just ignore it. That's a toss-up.

I actually like the Backyard area. Usually it's kind of funny and I have thick skin. I am one of those that if I don't like something, I avoid it. Some would benefit from that state of mind. It's pretty easy to change the channel.

[wheatonFJR]

Seems reasonable and well said.

[wetwolf]

Ya, know, I just found a really interesting article about the covid and was gonna post it, but my thread got disappeared. I never personally insulted anybody, although i may have asked about their education level and why it seemed to be below thier age, but what the hey. I can skip over any thread i don't want to read, and do often. What happened the the thick skinned donky rapin shit eaters?

[Bounce]

Huh. Weird how I missed this for over a week!

What follows is 100% my opinion. If you think it will hurt your feelings, don't read it. Simple.

If someone does not want anything hurtful hurled their way, they should not start divisive conversations or make divisive posts. Simple. IF a person starts down that road and they get reminded that they are an idiot, well, they had an opinion and so did someone else. Again, simple. Nothing to cry about or report. Move on. Simple.

I am 100% sure I'm am one of the offending meanies. A forum friend and I were talking about this stuff the other day. I have also said it numerous times: If I talk smack about Canada or England, or Australia or any other country and a member lives in one of those countries, its about the same as talking smack about their brother. That is absolutely not a conversation to start over the internet.

A while back, a citizen of a county outside of the US would not stop bashing us, after repeated requests to stop. Funny how his posts were never censored but the rest of us heard about it. I 100% admit, I finally went off. I had had enough. Thread got deleted or locked or whatever. I fully expected a time out and didn't get one. I appreciate that.

The recent Covid thread was delving into the same shenanigans. One member seems to LOVE expressing how he is imposing a negative financial impact on those who do not agree with him. Maybe he forgets that some members here have been negatively impacted financially and that shit just isn't funny or cute. No idea, but again, that trash talking was ok, but when I reminded him that I believe he's a clown, suddenly complaints were filed and the thread was again shut down. Heck, pretty sure I didn't even say any real cuss words in that final post. Does my opinion matter that much? I'm flattered!! Why anyone cares what I think is beyond me.

For anyone who is curious, there is NOTHING I will say over the internet that I won't say while standing in front of you. I'm a big boy and I won't cry about my consequences.

We each have our own rules and two of mine are, 1-Don't talk trash about our president. Neither the current one I don't like, nor the previous one I did like are fair game. 2-Don't talk trash about my country. We have our problems, just like you have yours. If you don't like it here, don't come here. There are plenty of countries I don't visit. Hell, I have turned down two very lucrative contracting jobs in two different countries. Just couldn't bring myself to want to live in those places for a year. Never forget this, I love my country enough to give my life for it, and I may not like you at all. I expect you to have the same feelings about your own country and me.

Basically, I'm a, "Remove the plank from your own eye before you worry about the splinter in your neighbor's eye." Once ALL your problems are handled, then, maybe, you may tell us how to handle ours.

The reality is, I was on the verge of stopping coming here. Totally about the time that stuff was popping off. I have to deal with people's BS at work. I don't expect that to happen at the places I go to have fun. I have found that making a couple members, "Foes" in my profile has been a good thing. I don't see their posts, and I'm happier for it. I really like some threads and kind of avoid others. I have not tattle-told on anyone since the 3rd grade, so I won't report your post. I am an opinionated asshole, so I may respond or maybe I'll just ignore it. That's a toss-up.

I actually like the Backyard area. Usually it's kind of funny and I have thick skin. I am one of those that if I don't like something, I avoid it. Some would benefit from that state of mind. It's pretty easy to change the channel.

[NTXFJR]

Oh dammit, nicely said AJ. Ditto!

In regard to folks bashing our countries sometimes eff'd up policies, I'd say there are some professional shit stirrers out there looking to have their brand of fun by criticizing the things our govt does and/or our like or dislike of them, and that maybe sometimes they're just poking the bear in fun. When one of my political threads got shut down some time back because a forum member lost his shit and started name calling over a Canadian member shit talking about our govt's policies, I saw the humor in it, but Wayne did not and locked the thread. I thought it was a bit harsh and unfair that a thread I started was shut down since it wasn't me doing the bad mouthing, and we are supposed to be grown assed men with thick skin. But this is not "my" forum, and no doubt Wayne and Tim are forced to deal with shit sandwich situations from time to time that may lead to occasionally harsh reactions. Still,I feel the vibe of where he is trying to go with this forum, can't we all be friends, I wouldn't argue that for a minute. But the cry babies seem to keep the admins riled up and on edge imo.

And btw, what makes you think anyone in this forum really cares about what you think, are you an idiot? (Said in my most giddy and giggly tone of inflection while waiting for my hug)